I know you want to stay.
I know that you want to believe that the pain will stop.
I know that all the voices in your head are convincing you that staying is the safer option.
I also know that love is blind,
And so very stupid sometimes.
Your gut feeling is right.
It was right all along.
Nothing is going to change.
You will still cry yourself to sleep.
You will still live bearing the threat of being abandoned if you do not follow the rules.
You will still wake up every morning next to someone who’s constantly reminding you that you’re not enough,
Like choosing you is a favor.
I know you want to believe they’ll change,
See your worth,
Suddenly realize you’re the best thing they’ve ever had,
Finally give you the love that you deserve.
It. Will. Not. Happen.
People change, yes.
But never into a whole different person.
Toxicity is in the blood.
It will mutate and change its face,
It will manipulate you into believing your judgement was wrong,
But it will still be there.
Engulfing you until you become a shadow of the person you’ve always wanted to be.
Is this what you deserve?
Is this your actual worth?
Why are you selling yourself cheap?
Aren’t all the people who love you and respect you enough to let you know how precious you are?
Why are you lowering the bar,
That literally anyone can step over it?
It’s time to finally understand that what you’re in,
What you’re holding on to,
Is not love.
It’s the idea of it.
You’re so consumed and blinded by the idea of finding love that you’ve forgotten to try and figure out what it should be like.
And THIS is where you went wrong.
The rush to find your soulmate,
The paralyzing fear of ending up alone,
The peer pressure,
Believing you had a task with a deadline to finish,
All of this has led you to accept whatever came your way.
You lost yourself in the process.
But is that what you really want?
Is this who you really want to be?
Isn’t it, finally,
The right time to leave?